The city that Job built

There are definite reasons why Satyajit Ray's Gorosthane Sabdhan is my most favorite Felu-da story. It not only revolves around the intricacies of a family tree but also the background is old Calcutta. I am a very big fan of the history of Calcutta and I am, still now, the second person in our family to have (and maintain) an extensive family tree spanning seven generations.

Arnab and I spent many an evening discussing about old Calcutta, so yesterday we trudged along to the museum inside Victoria Memorial Hall. If you want to know Calcutta, that is the first lesson. Other than the Regal history of our city, life size statues of Dalhousie, Hastings, Wellesly and the rest, Victoria's piano on which she took lessons as a little girl, cannons from the Battle of Plassey (the landmark battle from which British rule started in India) and swords of different famous rulers, including the Mughal Emperor Aurangzeb, there is the history of our city... the city that Job built.

It gives me a pleasant kind of goose bumps to think how Job Charnock, on one sultry afternoon in August on looking over the swampy grounds next to the river Hooghly, all of a sudden decided that he'll build a city there. It was as abrupt as that. "The mid-day halt of Charnock" that laid the foundation of this throbbing metropolis of today.

Walking along the displays of that section in Victoria Memorial Hall called Calcutta Chronicles, I could actually see for myself how the city grew. Just like a human being, to evolve intellectually, you first need education and a lot of exposure to the outside world. That would enable you to see where you are standing. From there comes political, social and spiritual consciousness. Then would you actually grow.

Calcutta went through the same phases. In the initial days, there was just a Kali temple and three swampy villages named Gobindopur, Sutanuti and Kolikata. After half a century, the British on being chased by the nawab of Bengal Siraj-ud-daullah built a fort next to the river Hooghly called Fort William (it is now the base of the Eastern Command of our army). When Siraj was finally defeated in the Battle of Plassey and the British East India Company transformed the merchant's weighing scale to the staff of the ruler overnight, the British started investing in Calcutta. Then grew the "white town" and the "bazaar Kolkata", roads were built and the city started expanding. Zamindars (land lords) from rural Bengal started settling in here. Calcutta still did not have the intelligentsia. Slowly and steadily the education system started growing. The University of Calcutta, Bengal Engineering College, Presidency College, along with a host of different schools all started in the 19th century. Education opened the eyes of the new generation. They saw where the society is... what utter non sense is there in the slimy rituals of a malpracticed religion. From there started the Renaissance, rebirth of Calcutta. I wonder how it was possible for so many brilliant people to be born at around the same time. Is that why we are living in a vacuum now? There was a new burst of life in every possible field we can think of. From socio-political to religious, there came a time when breaking of old laws and bringing in a breath of new life was seen in the society as a whole. Major social events were legalizing widow remarriage and introducing girls to education. In science and technology, in the field of literature and arts, everywhere there was first a consciousness and then a realization of what kind of life we are leading. Then came the urge to change and grow....to liberate India. To change to a better country.

Whatever I am today, the way I look around myself, think and behave has been possible because of all these people. The way they molded the generations that were yet to come is truly incredible. The power of Vivekananda, the patriotism of Netaji and the philosophy of Rabindranath are enough for me to understand and follow to become what I call a human being. And I am so glad that I can be proud of my roots.

Questions people ask (and the replies)

I don't really like the things people share on Facebook like chain mails. However, it is one such about which I'm writing today. That post said something like people will never cease to ask you stupid personal questions. As long as you are single, people will ask when you want to get married. Once you get married, they'll ask you about babies. If anyone gets divorced, they'll ask why that happened....that thing continues. Though I am not someone with whom people would want to mess with, I still am asked questions which I prefer to not answer and let that person know that it is very rude to ask those.

When I go visit India, the first thing what people ask is - if I have lost some weight. Even on Facebook, looking at a random picture of mine, people will ask this. Well, I was never ever anything but skinny (from around five years of age). Also, I have never really "lost weight" either. Some women ask me if I am on a diet. Why, lady, why? Why would I be on a diet? And here's the funny part, most of them are random people. Like neighbors near my in-laws house or distant relatives, who hardly ever see me. They need to be told that this is not just a "conversation topic". I'll probably reply them with a - "yeah looks like you have become much fatter too."

Angry

Next is, I think THE MOST COMMON question for married girls - "is there any good news?" That is the round about question for asking - when are you going to have a baby? To which I have thought of an answer. I actually tried this last time to some distant aunts. I replied - "yes, there are lots of good news. I got a great job, we bought a house, our cat is doing awesome. what else do you want to hear?" That makes them nervous!

For single people who are harassed with "when are you getting married?" or who at some weddings are told "you are next", my Pastor had a solution. He said that at the next funeral you attend, poke that person and say "you are next". :D :D

Then there are questions about my cats. What they eat, where they sleep, where to they go to bathroom at, how much money do I spend on them on a monthly basis. I mean yes, I understand I do spend money for feeding my pets and for their general well being and also for a pet sitter when we are away, but if you have kids, would I ask you how much money you spend on them, why you spend so much money to have a nanny and such? Also, the cats didn't choose to come stay at our house, we chose to bring them. So we must provide the best care that we can. I don't want to have a cat which is not spayed/neutered, would run out of the house and feed him on scraps like some people do.

The problem is that most people are unnecessarily nosy and they don't even have the basic intelligence to understand that being so nosy is actually very rude and stupid at the same time. It makes others dislike and avoid them. At least I feel like doing so. Conversations should not make others feel bad or insult them, even if that is done unknowingly. The person you are poking to get married probably is heartbroken after splitting with his girlfriend, the one you are asking to have a baby and commenting that couples now-a-days don't care to start a family may not be in a position to afford a baby right now, even though they desperately want one.

Think before you say something. A little thought goes a long way.

'tis the season

I have seriously thought about this...even though we all say that sunny weather is awesome, I still don't want it to be bright and sunny till eight o' clock in winter. It somehow just doesn't suit. Can you imagine looking at a well lit Christmas tree when the sun is blazing outside till late evening? How terrible! The weather outside needs to be frightful in order to make the fire to be so delightful. I had this realization during Thanksgiving when I was watching my friend carve the turkey but it still holds good for the entire winter.

It's already a week and half into December and Christmas is sneaking up real quick. Stockings for Mota, May, Peanut Butter and La would be hung from our fireplace soon, ready to be stuffed with kitty goodies, catnip toys and treats. Christmas movies on TV, shopping malls are all decorated, Salvation Army people ringing little tiny bells, reminding you to spend a little thought for those not that fortunate. That's the spirit of Christmas... that's what makes me feel so good!

Is there anyone who doesn't love Christmas movies? I mean can there be anyone who doesn't like Christmas movies? Is that even possible? Doesn't the jingling sound of bells and the thought of stockings hanging from a fireplace just make you fuzzy warm? It does to me :) The thought of going home, being with family and the thought of giving is what makes this season special to me.

Frosty with friend in our back yard

It was long back when I used to act in Christmas plays in junior school, or sing carols as part of the school choir. It's also been sixteen years since I read "The Gift of the Magi" or "A Christmas Carol", but good for me that the spirit of Christmas hasn't abandoned me. I remember when we had to give gifts to the kids at Mother Teresa's organization. Wrapping the toys with colorful paper, carefully so that the papers wouldn't tear. Coming from one of the largest schools in the world, there's no doubt why almost half of our school courtyard would be filled with gifts for the not-so-fortunate kids. When schools teach these, they automatically push students a notch up in the scale of humanity. Today I saw on TV that some little kid is donating all her birthday money for some fund raiser and schools organizing toy drives.

We have a toy drive and a food bank donation going on at work. A bake sale is coming up too next week for which I baked my first batch of forty spiral cookies :) I love to be around enthusiastic people, people who care and want to "DO" something. With our donation drives, some people are setting up boxes, some are putting flyers up. One girl was rubbing her hands in anticipatory joy of being able to bake some stuff. One person volunteered to drive to Seattle to drop off the toys...that's the kind of mentality I like. People who take actions, people who are positive. Not grumbling about weird imaginary stuff, but really caring about people who need help and offering to lend that helping hand.

PS: There are Scrooges too, but well, Scrooge changed later into a nice man. So let's hope for the best for these people too :)

K.C. Nag

Yes, yes, you have read it right. It is that person who has taken endless pains to teach mathematics to countless generation of Bengali students over the ages.

While I was waiting for Arnab to get done with his haircut, I was flipping through "Parenting" magazine. Where I found that one lady has given tips to parents on how to guide their kids through daily homework, including maths problems. It was all about raising kids (especially girls) with an interest in STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics) majors. The solutions made me drop my jaw! 10 minutes of homework for someone in grade one and 10 minutes more every year?? I once looked at a Mathnasium advertisement on what school kids from grade 1 to 5 are supposed to achieve at Mathematics. That also drove me crazy! It looks like we are pros at Mathematics... the reason? K.C. Nag!

In the society I grew up, if you were good at science subjects, you were automatically considered a good student. While I definitely don't agree with this, I should admit that this pressure makes students consider mathematics with respect and as a result spend a lot of time in learning and practicing that.

Even though in my school days I would not consider my math scores good (as I was prone to silly mistakes and a + and - might get interchanged in my sums, an x might lose the power of 2 at any random time) but I would say that being analytic by nature, I used to like solving arithmetic and geometry problems. Algebra looked too boring to me and I didn't ever get the hang of trigonometry after we stopped calculating heights and distances. Calculus was taught in kind of a hurry and I need to spend some time on that now to learn it thoroughly. But Geometry has never ceased to awe me. The visual clues with the challenge of finding a solution was a great experience in my early teen life.

Where K. C. Nag used to teach

K.C. Nag wrote a book called "Modern Mathematics" to which I was introduced in class (grade) 5. What did it contain? Pages and pages of problems on - profit and loss, time and work, time and distance, ratio proportion, revolution of wheels and what not! Some of these have become immortal like the famous problem of a tank with 2 or 3 three taps to fill it (each would take a different time to fill it all alone) and a hole through which water leaks. If all of these are in full function, how long would it take the tank to fill? Another funny one was if it takes 12 seconds for a clock to strike 12, how long would it take to strike 5? (Not 5 seconds). There was one about a monkey trying to climb up a slippery pole. Every second, he climbs some distance but slips down a little. How long would it take him to climb to the top? (My aunt, not at all good at these, came up with a solution of 2.5 monkeys. No one knows how she managed to turn the unit of time into a "monkey".) Even more interesting were the time and distance problems with famous calculations for time taken by a train to cross a pole or to cross a platform. Then there was ratio and proportion where water was added to milk or amalgamated metals formed out of weird proportions. Learning to measure time and calculate conversions in the metric system (it was EASY in the metric system. I find the old English style HORRIBLE.)

Through the years till the end of school, I would practice these problem solving everyday (especially for a couple hours after lunch as that was the tradition in Bengali homes). Later I opted for an additional paper of Mathematics so I had to work even harder. I wouldn't say that I realized the value then, but now when I look back I understand what this can do. It has given me a confidence that things can be solved scientifically. Made me understand that science is always true (2+2 will add up to 4, everywhere, all the time). Opened a world of numbers in front of me which is really very fascinating (like pi. Isn't that awesome?) and has sharpened my analytic skills if not anything else. It is not for nothing that people with strong background in mathematics tend to become better software developers. They think and solve... that's it! 

Cat antics

Caring for a pet is a full time job. Caring for two is well...when you forget that you even exist. They capture your existence... especially if they are cats. As they say - "dogs have owners, cats have staff". There is an endless cycle of feeding (canned and dry food separately), cleaning litter boxes, cuddling with them, playing and breaking their fights and guerrilla attacks from behind the couch or suddenly from above. You learn to sleep with one cat walking on your hair or sleep through sudden nips on your big toe. You stop fretting about brushing your black jacket before going to a fancy dinner (as they all have layers of cat hair) and definitely believe that "everything tastes better with cat hair in it".  You learn to live in their reign.

It's a wonderful (cat's) life

Kitty parents know what cat antics are. All cats have strong individuality but even then there are some idiosyncrasies common to the felines. The funniest one I think is scratching and pulling down toilet paper rolls. Someone aptly called it a kitty treadmill. I don't know how all of them found out that this particular thing in a human household can be so fantastic! I am sure they set and break kitty records on how fast they can pull a roll down. 

Hide and seek

Stringy things or feathers attached to wands are another plaything they love. My friend's furry boy and girl (Vinny and Kitty) were raving over one such "bird". Vinny being a teenager was jumping probably three feet high and showing amazing back flips! We bought the same wand for Mota and May and Mota has started hunting that "bird" now too. May would just bat at it and leave it, but Mota pounces on it like a little hunter and doesn't let go! I can spend hours and watch them at their hunting... 

Peanut Butter is a catnip fan. I mean most cats are, but PB is the GREATEST catnip fan I have seen so far. We gave him many different catnip toys - a slug shaped one, a cigar like one and a turtle-shaped one were his most favorites. He went crazy over them and chewed and played and kicked and rolled over until the catnip came out. Then he licked that and went to sleep. 

"I'll let mommy read. I better take a nap."

That's one mamma's boy :)

Sometimes, just like little babies, they are scared of random stuff. We had always thought that May is a tough girl but then, as Arnab was cleaning the garage, he had to bring our telescope inside (with the tripod and all) in the hall. God knows what May is thinking it to be, but she is so scared even to look at the three-legged monster. I admit that it is big, well HUGE compared to May, but it is after all just a telescope. It doesn't move around, nor does it make any noise like the dryer and I can never imagine that anyone ever chased May around with a huge telescope in hand!! Whatever it is, she is just plain scared. Yesterday when I came home and Mota came to greet me, May didn't. I asked Mota "where's your sister" and I heard May replying in a squeaky voice from underneath the dining table. She clearly meant, "Mom, I'm here. I can't go over there, the monster is standing there." The hungry little girl ran up to the telescope and then promptly turned back totally ignoring her food dish that Arnab was taking upstairs! Later when I was carrying her upstairs, she kept on tightly hugging me just like a human baby as we passed the telescope!

Latest score of Telescope vs. May is :

Telescope - 2

May - 0

PS: For a good read on cat antics, click here.

Second chance

A friend gifted me a flowering plant on my birthday which was two and a half months back. It was one of those bright yellow flowering pots wrapped in a bright paper and sold at super markets. I had it on my work desk. When all the flowers died, people who sit around me at work had the idea that I would throw it in the bin and so they were interested to see me snipping the dead buds and browning leaves off and watering the plant which had no flowers. I regularly kept it on a west facing window sill (on those days the Sun decided to rise in Seattle) and after coming back from the Thanksgiving weekend here's what I see.

New tiny buds getting ready to bloom.

I gave the plant a second chance and helped it to stay healthy. So it repaid me by blooming once more.

I think everyone deserves a second chance. From relationships to pets to criminals. There is nothing that you cannot do with patience and compassion. I am not saying that you need to let a criminal go scot-free. No, definitely not. Nor would keeping him in a prison without actually helping him be any good. But patiently trying to change him, bringing in him new hope and compassion would definitely do some good. Exemplary punishments are needed in cases, but we will still need to back track and see what events lead to a person bringing in hate and cruelty so that we can stop more people getting into that vicious cycle.

More and more people are losing patience nowadays. As a result, relationships are suffering. People want instant solutions to problems, but forget that in the human world things don't move that fast (and should not, either). If something doesn't work, people walk out of relationships without even thinking of a second chance. Broken homes lead to broken hearts, which is worse because most of the insecurity is faced by kids. I am not saying that people should not divorce. When things just can't be fixed or the relationship has become abusive, then definitely people have to break up. My point is, give it a second chance. If that doesn't work, then think of other solutions.

Many senior animals have been surrendered to shelters or worse still, on the road. Some get saved, while most just die. When you adopt a surrendered animal from a shelter, you are giving a second chance. It is difficult. The senior pet might not romp around the house or look cute as a button. He/she will probably have behavioral issues or would need better health care, but if you have the patience, you will have a faithful companion beside you for a long time and you'll know that at least one life is happy and content because of you.

Don't forget to give yourself second chances too. Everyone makes mistakes, so don't be too hard on yourself for occasionally missing a mark. That's ok. A little forgiveness and an encouraging smile can be magical. Try it out for yourself :)

A Bengali girl in a French kitchen

For the first 23 years of my life at a stretch, my world of food revolved around rice, fish and vegetables cooked in traditional Bengali way. We occasionally ate out and street foods played a very important role during those years. Then came the period of thriving on instant noodles and coffee and eating cheeseburgers everyday for lunch! (The only time in my life when I managed to gain some weight.) Finally after getting married I started to try my hand at cooking various kinds of food.

Learning new things from scratch is a very satisfying feeling, be it a new programming language or a new cuisine. What I believe truly is if you want to learn, there's no end of resources to learn from :) I tried to cook some archaic Bengali food, well, may not be that "archaic" in the real world but definitely to me. That boosted my confidence a lot. As I never cooked anything while still in Calcutta, I never had any idea if I was a good or bad cook. After finding that I love to cook, I started trying my hand at western cooking following some of Martha Stewart's recipes. Watching "Julie and Julia" for probably the 15th time, it dawned on me that I can try to master the art of French cooking too! In the mean time, I went wine tasting with a couple friends and started learning about pairing wine and cheese with different foods.

As I had almost no idea whatsoever with French cuisine, I started learning it very patiently, reading the recipe at first, noting down the ingredients and watching one episode of Julia Child's "The French Cook" from YouTube before getting near the dutch oven :-) Arnab gifted me a copy of "Mastering the art of French Cooking" and a dutch oven for Thanksgiving and I started off with the first baby steps towards cooking bouef bourguignon.

Choosing to cook bouef bourguignon as the first French dish was probably not a "baby step", I could have tried a soup or something simpler, but this was because the movie inspired me to take on this challenge!

Fred Meyer's did a good job of selling pre-packaged "beef for stewing" which was boneless beef already chopped into bite sized chunks. The thick cut bacon was also quite good for my purpose. Cremini mushrooms are always available and I probably emptied the box myself. Buying the wine was a little difficult as I hardly knew how to pronounce the names (I wrote all the options down on my shopping list) and finally got a young Chianti that, according to Julia Child would fit my purpose.
The thing I learned from cooking this stew is, it is not a difficult dish but extremely time consuming. Bengali dishes are far more complicated compared to this, but I don't know of anything that has a two and half to three hours cooking time (not including the preparation). Also, the only seasoning needed for this was salt and pepper. The entire flavor came from the beef being stewed in red wine and beef broth. (Well, a little thyme and a bay leaf was added.) Another great thing was butter. The pearl onions were braised in butter and the mushrooms were sauteed in some more...then they got added to the meat. So there was a LOT of butter!

As the entire thing was stewed in wine, there was a distinctive taste that I have never had in anything so far. The dish is very heavy too and just a little would keep you filled for hours. If you have a dinner roll or even buttered peas with it, it will go a long way!

So that was an "encounter of the third kind" with French cooking and the result? Arnab said he can eat this bouef bourguignon every week.

Many thanks to Julia Child for meticulously jotting down step by step details of this foreign dish for "servantless" people like me, to whoever uploaded the episodes of "The French Chef" on YouTube and also to Nora Ephron for making the movie which opened up a whole new world in front of me (and to Arnab for his encouragement, being the first one to eat the experimental cooking and for being the "Paul Child", taking pictures on his new Windows 8 phone all along!)