"Do you buy your clothes at the kids department?"
"Your bones would make good toothpicks."
These have been comments that I am very familiar with. People have grabbed my wrists to show how small they are, some have also grabbed my neck to show how small it is. I have been asked why I need to work out and yes, many times I have been told to eat more or else I would be blown away by the wind. I have got many comments on photos posted on Facebook saying I look skinnier than before. The best part is when I visit India (almost annually) the same set of people ask me if I have lost more weight than the previous year. I wonder if there was any time in history when they have seen me as anything else but skinny. The fact that I am probably much healthier and have more energy than my so-called curvy counterparts escape people. Then there are some who just can't believe if I do gain weight. Even if I tell them that I have grown out of my clothes, they will confidently say that the cotton clothes have shrunk.
Why is it not ok to fat shame people even when they are using the word "fat shaming" as an excuse to lead unhealthy lifestyles but it is ok to skinny shame someone who eats healthy and is a regular hiker? No I am not "lucky", I don't starve, I am not "on a diet", it is in my genes to have a faster metabolism. You can be jealous that I drink whole milk and don't gain a pound but there is nothing that you (or I) can do about it.
It is mean to make fun of anyone's weight. I understand that people might not be meaning any harm, but a constant reminder that "you need to gain weight in order to look pretty" doesn't do good for a girl's confidence. I know very well that shopping for a watch or a bracelet is difficult. I know that there are very few clothes that I can wear (thanks Ann Taylor for your petite section). These are reminders enough and I don't need your snarky comments to add to that. I am lucky to not let these things matter and I was unfamiliar with the term negative body image until in my late twenties but considering the general population, skinny shaming can be as bad as fat shaming. If you really find someone starving herself or not eating properly explain to her why an optimum body weight matters. Yes, I am trying to gain weight, not because it will make me look nice but because I need to maintain an optimum weight in order to stay healthy as I age. I am eating well, at regular times and yes, I can indulge myself with chocolate croissants and hot chocolate if I want to without any worry. If you try to shame me because you are jealous about it, sorry! One of my friends said that it is a coping mechanism of unhealthy overweight people. I agree with her, especially after I have heard people tell me, "I used to be like you before having kids" with a sigh. But hey, you know what, my mom is still pretty slim after having me so sorry if I disappoint you by staying slim even after having kids.
Why I brought this topic up today?
1. I feel it is unfair to make anyone feel bad about the way she looks.
2. It is even more unfair when you can't call a fat person fat but can easily shout out to a skinny person from across the room telling her to eat another sandwich.
3. A healthy mind in a healthy body is all that matters.
4. I will be going to India soon and woe to that person who greets me with a "did you lose more weight?" comment this time. This is a fair warning.
"Your bones would make good toothpicks."
These have been comments that I am very familiar with. People have grabbed my wrists to show how small they are, some have also grabbed my neck to show how small it is. I have been asked why I need to work out and yes, many times I have been told to eat more or else I would be blown away by the wind. I have got many comments on photos posted on Facebook saying I look skinnier than before. The best part is when I visit India (almost annually) the same set of people ask me if I have lost more weight than the previous year. I wonder if there was any time in history when they have seen me as anything else but skinny. The fact that I am probably much healthier and have more energy than my so-called curvy counterparts escape people. Then there are some who just can't believe if I do gain weight. Even if I tell them that I have grown out of my clothes, they will confidently say that the cotton clothes have shrunk.
Why is it not ok to fat shame people even when they are using the word "fat shaming" as an excuse to lead unhealthy lifestyles but it is ok to skinny shame someone who eats healthy and is a regular hiker? No I am not "lucky", I don't starve, I am not "on a diet", it is in my genes to have a faster metabolism. You can be jealous that I drink whole milk and don't gain a pound but there is nothing that you (or I) can do about it.
It is mean to make fun of anyone's weight. I understand that people might not be meaning any harm, but a constant reminder that "you need to gain weight in order to look pretty" doesn't do good for a girl's confidence. I know very well that shopping for a watch or a bracelet is difficult. I know that there are very few clothes that I can wear (thanks Ann Taylor for your petite section). These are reminders enough and I don't need your snarky comments to add to that. I am lucky to not let these things matter and I was unfamiliar with the term negative body image until in my late twenties but considering the general population, skinny shaming can be as bad as fat shaming. If you really find someone starving herself or not eating properly explain to her why an optimum body weight matters. Yes, I am trying to gain weight, not because it will make me look nice but because I need to maintain an optimum weight in order to stay healthy as I age. I am eating well, at regular times and yes, I can indulge myself with chocolate croissants and hot chocolate if I want to without any worry. If you try to shame me because you are jealous about it, sorry! One of my friends said that it is a coping mechanism of unhealthy overweight people. I agree with her, especially after I have heard people tell me, "I used to be like you before having kids" with a sigh. But hey, you know what, my mom is still pretty slim after having me so sorry if I disappoint you by staying slim even after having kids.
Why I brought this topic up today?
1. I feel it is unfair to make anyone feel bad about the way she looks.
2. It is even more unfair when you can't call a fat person fat but can easily shout out to a skinny person from across the room telling her to eat another sandwich.
3. A healthy mind in a healthy body is all that matters.
4. I will be going to India soon and woe to that person who greets me with a "did you lose more weight?" comment this time. This is a fair warning.
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